Who Made the Grade?

I set my alarm for 7am Sunday morning. I had to make sure I was up in time to insert the white horse pill two hours before my transfer. Once I did that I jumped in the shower so I could get ready for B and C's big day. I thought about what was about to take place and wondered why I didn't feel nervous at all. It seemed strange to me that I felt so calm about it.
B and C arrived at the hotel earlier than expected. I think they were both pretty excited to have finally reached this point. The 2 minute car ride consisted of us chatting up a storm and laughing. Once we arrived and checked in we sat in the waiting room talking about everything from the weather to birthday parties to the procedure. 
When the nurse called me back she gave me the normal instructions... undress from the waist down and cover up with the sheet. I did just as she instructed. In the meantime she went to get B and C so they could speak with the doctor about the embryos, It was the first time they were hearing about how much they had progressed. 
It felt like I sat on that table/bed forever. It was really only about 10 minutes. I noticed how dark and cold it seemed. There were not relaxing pictures on the wall or decorations outside of a calender that had some random saying about friends that I can't seem to remember. I noticed the counter on the wall and realized that the last person in there had 10 eggs retrieved.  I could see that a lot of the machine parts were made by Burton and wondered if it was the same Burton that made snowboards? In front of me was one of those doors that were cut in half where only the top portion would open. Through the crack I could see lights and people moving around but I really couldn't make out what they were doing. And for a moment I thought to myself that this was my last chance to run away.

When the doctor came in he (yes HE. Dr C wasn't there!! Woot!) showed me a graph with numbers and letters written on it. He explained that out of all the embryos only 2 of them graded "okay". He went on to explain that while they were not perfect, they were very close and suggested that we transfer both. He took the time to show me pictures of them (which were pretty cool) and went over the grading process. It was something along the lines of two grades, one for big they were and one for how far into the cycle they were. The two embryos he had were A,B and B,B. Sounded good to me! I did notice while he was talking that the other embryos were all graded F's and G's. I couldn't help but feel a little sad for B. I hope they they continue to develop so that she has some to put back and freeze.
The doctor stepped out for a moment to give me time to talk things over with B and C. We all agreed that we would transfer both embryos!!

The rest of the process was all about feeling vs seeing. In the beginning I could see into the "secret" room and noticed an incubator that you would see and infant in NICU in. Inside were tiny petri dishes. How cool!
I turned my attention to the monitor as the doctor did whatever it was he was doing down there. I remember feeling a gush of warm liquid which he later explained as cleaning everything in there off. When we was ready for the transfer he used a very long skinny catheter to insert the embryos into my uterus. I have to tell you that watching it happen was one of the most amazing things I have ever seen. It looked like two tiny white bubbles being shot inside me. I sat there and watched them slowly float up and rest on the walls of my uterus and I was in awe. We waited for a minute for the guys behind the secret door to confirm the catheter was empty and we were done. I had to remain lying down for 10 minutes then I was free to go.
I watched to second hands move on the clock and got up at 9:45. I got dressed, ran to the bathroom, and met B and C in the waiting room where B greeted me with a hug.
I left with 3 forms in my hand and instructions to continue both estrogen's and the progesterone shots. I have two appointments for blood work, one of July 6 to check my progesterone, estradiol, and hCG levels, and one on July 8 to check progesterone and hCG again. I was also told that I can take a HPT but not until July 4.

So I'm currently 2 days post a 5 day transfer with only 6 days left to test and I'm dying waiting! :) I imagine B is too! I don't feel any additional side effects outside of the ones I feel from the pills/shots but I'm hoping and praying that I get a BFP on July 4th!!!

Ready... Set... GO!

Just got the phone call!! Looks like we are heading up Saturday (by we I mean, Sequel, Joelie, my mom, and me) B is coming to get me Sunday to go to the appointment with me. I have to insert a progesterone pill called, Prometrium at 7am and come in at 8:45 with a full bladder. The transfer is scheduled for 9am and they are transferring two of the 27 embryos! I'm so excited and can't wait. Hopefully between her super human eggs and my dynamite uterus this will work the first time and we will get a BFP on July 6th! Wish us luck!! 

Side Effects in Full Force

Woke up this morning excited for B and her big step today; egg retrieval. I can't wait for an update and to know how it all went. I'm super anxious for her and hope that she isn't in too much pain.
I felt great first thing this morning. My bum only hurts a little at last nights injection spot, like a bruise. Sadly as the day progresses I've started feeling really bad. I'm not sure if it's the antibiotic, the progesterone or both, but something is making me feel not so hot. My back hurts, my head is killing me. I feel nervousness and pretty sure I'm going to vomit at any moment. This stinks.

Today's Drug of Choice is...

I started my Estradiol Sunday afternoon like a good little girl. One 2mg tablet placed near my uterus (or as high as I can reach) once a day. Sunday was also the last day for the Lupron injections. 
This afternoon Nurse C called and told me that she had talked to Dr C and things were still a go. She told me there was nothing else I could do to raise my estrogen levels outside of the Vivelle Dot Patches and the Estradoil. She also informed me that they wouldn't take additional blood tests to make sure my levels had increased, that they would just rely on the pills to do their job. So B's big day is tomorrow and I should know Thursday afternoon when they want me to be there, I'm guessing Friday.

Tonight was a lot of fun with starting the Progesterone shot! Nurse C taught Casey how to administer them at our appointment last week. It took a while for us to get it done and there was a lot of nervous laughter but we managed to do it after a pep talk with my friend Krystal! It wasn't even that bad. Heck, I didn't even feel it! (I'm sure I will tomorrow)
So now I'm on Estradiol, Vivelle Dot's, Progesterone AND.... antibiotics.
Despite everything that went down with Dr C, and all these crazy drugs I'm pushing into my body, I'm excited! I can't wait for my appointment and I hope that I get to call B in 15-20 days telling her we are pregnant!

Some People Can Be So Rude

It's no secret that Dr C doesn't think highly of me. From our first visit she made it clear that she didn't care about me that B and C were what mattered. That was fine with me and made sense.
Thursday during my appointment she was her normal self. She performed the ultrasound, which looked great btw, and told me that she would let me know how the blood test came back and if I needed to do anything else. 
On the way back home Thursday I got a phone call from the nurse saying that the were calling in Estrogen pills for me because my levels were too low. I explained to her that we weren't going straight home and that it would be Friday or Saturday before I got the prescription.
Today was B's BIG appointment. Everything went well and she was scheduled for the retrieval on Tuesday. The nurse called to let me know that I would start Progesterone and the antibiotics tomorrow to prepare for the procedure next week. While we were chatting I let her know that I hadn't picked up the prescriptions yet because I hadn't received payment for B yet. She hung up with me, called Dr C, and called me back letting me know that Dr C would call me later that afternoon. Oh boy.
I knew the conversation wasn't going to be a good one and I was right. She came on the line asking me why I didn't pick up the Estrogen Thursday. I explained what I had already told the nurse to her and also explained that I didn't have the check in hand yet to purchase the drugs. I had even called B at this point to see if there was anything she could do to help get the money here sooner. Anyway... Dr C let me know that she was furious and threatened that she would just tell B and C to freeze their embryos instead of using me so that I didn't get paid. I held my ground and told her that she should do whatever she thought was best for B and C. She made a few more comments and I told her that I wasn't interested in arguing with her. I asked her what we could do to make things work. She told me to go and get the pills and start them today, so I did. She mentioned in all her rage that my levels were 140 and she needed them to be 500-600. She had no idea why my levels were so low with the Estrogen I have been taking. 
We left the conversation with her saying she would talk to her fellow doctor and decide what was best for B and C and whether to trust the ultrasound and my uterus or her lab and my levels. She would let me know.
I was so furious when I got off the phone with her. She has some nerves speaking to me the way she did. I understand that she has to do what is best for B and C  but being catty doesn't help any of us.
I guess now all I can do is wait. I took the pill as instructed and will start progesterone and the antibiotics tomorrow. If all goes as planned I'll be back there on Friday for the transfer. I know one thing... I'll be glad when I don't have to see Dr C ever again. 

You Need Me To Do What?

After our "couples therapy" I flew up for my medical evaluation. The doctor wasn't very happy with me skipping out on my first appointment and made it very clear how disappointed she was. I had to apologize and assure her a few times that I wouldn't flake again.
That day I got to experience my very first procedure, a mock transfer. For those of you that have no idea what that is... it is when the doctor inserts a catheter into your uterus to measure the length and depth. The whole thing was pretty uneventful and didn't take very long. I could have done without the cramps that lingered afterwards.
The rest of the appointment was spent with the nurse coordinator explaining our calenders and what would happen next. I had no idea what to expect with any of this so I was pretty shocked to learn about all the medication involved. 


A few weeks later a medium sized box arrived at my front door. I can't begin to explain how I felt when I started laying all the drugs, syringes, alcohol swabs, and instructions on the counter. I was pretty sure that I was going to pass out.

The first thing I started was birth control followed by Lupron injections. I'm not a fan of birth control pills in general but the ones I took weren't so bad. I didn't notice any side effects from them. The Lupron was a different story. I started out injecting 10 units in my stomach every night. At first the shots were uncomfortable, just a sting with a little burning but after a while the injection sites would itch. I also noticed some pretty ugly side effects. I couldn't sleep at night and would get uncomfortable ovulation type cramps. UGH. I couldn't find very much information online about the drug itself and the side effects (which was a tad scary) but I did find some forums with women talking about having the same problems. On a good note, it increased my sex drive! I'm only taking 5 units right now and only have a week left on the Lupron. I'm looking forward to stopping. 

I also started taking Estrogen in the form of patches. I have no complaints. I love what it's doing to my skin, hair, and boobs! :) I'm currently on three patches but move to four tomorrow.

The rest of this month is pretty busy. I've already had an ultrasound, blood work (twice), and urine testing done. I also got to have an HSG done. For those of you that don't know what that is, it's an x-ray test that looks at the inside of the uterus and fallopian tubes and the area around them. During a HSG, a dye is put through a thin tube that is put through the vagina and into the uterus. Because the uterus and the fallopian tubes are hooked together the dye will flow into the tubes. Pictures are taken using a steady beam of x-ray as the dye passes through the uterus and fallopian tubes. Fun, right? NO! The whole thing lasted about 5 minutes but it hurt. I'm not a wimpy person and can normally handle pain but the cramps during and afterwards were horrible. 




This week I have another ultrasound and more blood work and next week I begin progesterone and an antibiotic. If all goes as planned I'll be back the last week of the month for the Embryo transfer!!

Bumps In The Road...

I had a different idea in my head about how things would work. I never thought that B and I would be exchanging text messages or e-mails the day after the initial phone call. I thought that we would have a coordinator set up that would handle everything in between and that I would have little to no communication with the intended parents. Boy was I was wrong! 
It wasn't long until I started getting daily e-mails and text messages about what I needed to get and have done. I ordered copies of my medical records (wow who knew there were so many) and set up a psych consult (boy was that LONG). We had appointment's and medication scheduled with deadlines in place and a contract in the works.
I'll admit that all of this planning and discussing was a bit overwhelming at times. I went back and forth for a few days on if I could really do this or not. I even confided in my best mommy friends about my feelings and got a tremendous about of support and understanding. I even had a hard time just going on birth control. I haven't used that stuff in years and didn't want to put it in my body if I didn't have to. In the meantime the contract was still a work in progress with both B and I having input about what was included and not included in it. 
The started birth control and the first BIG appointment was set up. I was going to fly up and have my medical evaluation with the IVF doctor... only halfway there I got a text that the contract was done and e-mailed to me. I can't even begin to explain the way I felt as I slid through all 50 some odd pages on my iPhone. With each paragraph came a wave of panic and nausea. There were things in there that weren't suppose to be in there. The compensation wasn't exactly what I and just the length of the contract alone was enough to send my head spinning! I just wanted to go home. So I did. 
That day was awful. B and I exchanged text messages back in forth, some heated. I can only imagine how upset she was. We ended up having a conference call that night and discussed all "my" issues. We left the conversation agreeing to meet the next day for the couples psych consult.
That day sort sealed the deal for me. B and C became real people not just emails and text messages and they were pretty amazing. 
A couple of weeks later I ended up taking the flight and making my medical evaluation. I spent the whole day with B getting to know here better. I did get a lecture about missing the first appointment and had to apologize a few hundred times but overall, it went really well. 
Next stop... blood, ultrasounds, and injections.