Bumps In The Road...

I had a different idea in my head about how things would work. I never thought that B and I would be exchanging text messages or e-mails the day after the initial phone call. I thought that we would have a coordinator set up that would handle everything in between and that I would have little to no communication with the intended parents. Boy was I was wrong! 
It wasn't long until I started getting daily e-mails and text messages about what I needed to get and have done. I ordered copies of my medical records (wow who knew there were so many) and set up a psych consult (boy was that LONG). We had appointment's and medication scheduled with deadlines in place and a contract in the works.
I'll admit that all of this planning and discussing was a bit overwhelming at times. I went back and forth for a few days on if I could really do this or not. I even confided in my best mommy friends about my feelings and got a tremendous about of support and understanding. I even had a hard time just going on birth control. I haven't used that stuff in years and didn't want to put it in my body if I didn't have to. In the meantime the contract was still a work in progress with both B and I having input about what was included and not included in it. 
The started birth control and the first BIG appointment was set up. I was going to fly up and have my medical evaluation with the IVF doctor... only halfway there I got a text that the contract was done and e-mailed to me. I can't even begin to explain the way I felt as I slid through all 50 some odd pages on my iPhone. With each paragraph came a wave of panic and nausea. There were things in there that weren't suppose to be in there. The compensation wasn't exactly what I and just the length of the contract alone was enough to send my head spinning! I just wanted to go home. So I did. 
That day was awful. B and I exchanged text messages back in forth, some heated. I can only imagine how upset she was. We ended up having a conference call that night and discussed all "my" issues. We left the conversation agreeing to meet the next day for the couples psych consult.
That day sort sealed the deal for me. B and C became real people not just emails and text messages and they were pretty amazing. 
A couple of weeks later I ended up taking the flight and making my medical evaluation. I spent the whole day with B getting to know here better. I did get a lecture about missing the first appointment and had to apologize a few hundred times but overall, it went really well. 
Next stop... blood, ultrasounds, and injections.