It has finally been two weeks and beta testing day has arrived!
E has to be one of the sweetest people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. She sent me a text last night asking how I was feeling. I told her how nervous I was. She told me that she was nervous too but was at peace with whatever happens and so thankful for me.
I told her that I planned to take a home pregnancy test in the morning and asked if she wanted me to send her a picture. She said yes.
"If it is negative remember we have been through this before. So we are just so thankful for the chance!"
This morning arrived at an early 5:30am. I just couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned and told myself to just stay in bed until 6:30am. I didn't want to test too soon. I needed to make sure there was enough time between the last time I went to the bathroom and the first morning pee. Crazy. I know. I settled for 6:00am. As I sat down and unwrapped the package I said a silent prayer.
It seemed like it took forever for the urine to move across the testing window. I looked down and saw one line, and then one line. I twisted and turned the stick trying to see the second line but it just wasn't there.
Then I remembered that I told E I would send her a pic and my heart dropped. Could I really send her a picture of this? I thought about it and thought about and finally decided that I had to. 6:54am. Sent.
I held out hope that maybe the beta test would show something different. I searched the internet for people in the same situation that ended up with a BFP. I found a few. I went to the lab at 9am and had my blood drawn. From there it would go to Austin and once the results were in they would be faxed to Duke.
So I waited and hoped.
2:02pm a strange doctor calls to tell me that they have the beta results. They are negative. No numbers, nothing more. Just, sorry... it didn't work.
My heart breaks for E and C.
I told her that I planned to take a home pregnancy test in the morning and asked if she wanted me to send her a picture. She said yes.
"If it is negative remember we have been through this before. So we are just so thankful for the chance!"
This morning arrived at an early 5:30am. I just couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned and told myself to just stay in bed until 6:30am. I didn't want to test too soon. I needed to make sure there was enough time between the last time I went to the bathroom and the first morning pee. Crazy. I know. I settled for 6:00am. As I sat down and unwrapped the package I said a silent prayer.
It seemed like it took forever for the urine to move across the testing window. I looked down and saw one line, and then one line. I twisted and turned the stick trying to see the second line but it just wasn't there.
Then I remembered that I told E I would send her a pic and my heart dropped. Could I really send her a picture of this? I thought about it and thought about and finally decided that I had to. 6:54am. Sent.
I held out hope that maybe the beta test would show something different. I searched the internet for people in the same situation that ended up with a BFP. I found a few. I went to the lab at 9am and had my blood drawn. From there it would go to Austin and once the results were in they would be faxed to Duke.
So I waited and hoped.
2:02pm a strange doctor calls to tell me that they have the beta results. They are negative. No numbers, nothing more. Just, sorry... it didn't work.
My heart breaks for E and C.
